Should parents go meet their kids' potential mentors?

[deleted-3443]

My daughter had an appointment yesterday with a university professor. I drove her down, helped her find the right building, but otherwise stayed out. Afterwards, she said he would like to meet me sometime. Should I have gone with to his office?

I'm so used to hearing that homeschooled parents are too "helicopter"-ish and that professors really don't want to hear from students' parents, so I thought it best not to go in.

Anyway, they talked for two hours and she's all excited to read the papers he recommended this morning, so it obviously went fine without my presence.

Just wondering what the best protocol would be for the future.

Thanks.

[SciB]

Hi Janet,

I'm glad you are interested enough in the mentoring process to ask questions about what would be best for you to do. My initial reaction is to let your daughter handle the interviews herself because it builds her confidence. If she and the professor were talking about the project for two hours that means there was a lot of interest on both sides which is an excellent sign.

In this case, the professor asked to meet you, but in the future if the person does not ask for a meeting or call you I would follow up with a phone call to the mentor to thank them and to ask if there are any special requirements--safety equipment, tutorials, scheduling. This way you can establish your own contact with them while still allowing your daughter the freedom of setting up the project herself.

You certainly want to talk to your daughter about the project and learn the science behind it so that you can ask questions and guide her when necessary and of course Scibuddies will always be here to help with technical details.

Good luck and have fun!

Sybee

[deleted-143835]

Hi Janet,

I'm so excited to hear this question. I actually have had your daughter's experience--as a very recent high school student, I met with many college professors independently to have the opportunity to conduct research in university labs. Like you did, my mom did the exact same thing you did; in most cases, the professor or postdoc did not ask to meet with a parent. One did, so I just introduced my mom next time in person, but it's really no big deal. I think it's great that you gave your daughter the freedom to discuss her project with the professors (and clearly it went well), so next time you may just want to drop by and introduce yourself or say hi; but I think whatever you have said sounds fantastic. Just the way it should be, in my opinion!

Hope that helped!
scibuddyAK

[deleted-3443]

Thanks for the replies!